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Book of Arments
Chapter 2 verses 9-21

nd St Attila raised the hand grenade up on high,saying O'Lord bless this thy hand grenade."
Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that
with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and
did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and
breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must
count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall
be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then
proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the
counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe,
who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."